Post by Lee Gold XP
"Filk up the River" -- in Xeno #2
not as good as the Santa Ana song
FILK UP THE RIVER
by Lee Gold (written a few days before NOLACON in New Orleans)
to the tune of "Drink up the River" by Kathy Mar
I was sitting at a Circle with a bunch of crazy fen.
We sang "Banned from Ever Reading Eye of Argon Once Again."
We sang "Greensleeves on the Death Star"; we sang "Werewolves on the Moon",
And we sang all of the words we knew to Kathy Mar's sweet tune.
We started with the river of humanity and tech;
Then went on to the Riverworld and Richard Burton's trek.
And I've got some more verses with the self-same paradigm,
So let's filk up the River -- one more time.
We're going to filk up the River, we're going to filk up the River
We're going to filk up the River -- one more time. (repeat)
Now I live in California, in a city called L.A.
When it isn't rainy season, there is sunshine every day.
And the only river in it usually won't wet your feet,
But it keeps its shape because the city paved it with concrete.
So the summer hills are golden with dead brush and tumbleweed,
And when they catch on fire, they blaze very hot indeed,
But even in the summer heat, our lawns do not turn brown,
'Cause we pipe in our water, then drink it down.
We've got to pipe in our water, got to pipe in our water.
L.A. pipes in a River, then drinks it down. (repeat)
But when it's rainy season, then the hillsides turn to mud,
And the concrete L.A. River suddenly is all a-flood,
And every year some teenager thinks what fun it would be
To go surf the L.A. River until he has reached the sea.
There rarely is a rescue by the paramedic men;
Think of it as evolution, in action once again.
So don't you follow lit'rally what Kathy Mar has said,
'Cause you won't drink up the River; you'll drown instead.
No, you won't drink up the River; you can't drink up a river.
No, you won't drink up the River; you'll drown instead. (repeat)
Then there's the Mississippi, which needs another verse,
'Cause if the L.A. River's strange, the Mississippi's worse.
Geographers have mapped it --and drawn lines for its shores,
But it isn't quite housebroken, so it sometimes goes indoors.
And when the storm clouds gather, and the rain pours from the sky,
And the Mississippi's waters start getting very high,
Don't tell your friends you'll drink it; they'll just call you a clown.
You've got to sandbag the River till it goes down.
You've got to sandbag the River; you've got to sandbag the River.
You've got to sandbag the River till it goes down. (repeat)